Saturday, September 5, 2015

Prednisone Clarity

So it was one year ago that I decided it was time to leave managerial retail. With every fiber of my being I do not regret that decision. It was not a decision I made lightly.
After my concussion in 2010 and subsequent dealings with post concussion syndrome, I believed I could go back to that life and tow the corporate line. I believed I could balance. I loved the staff, the customers. I loved making people's day. But, I lost me. I lost my connection to my family. I gave up my martial arts because it was too many requirements, or so I thought. And so, the last 3 to 4 months of my job, I just survived.
In a lot of ways, I was doing a disservice to everyone in my life. I couldn't be my best at my job, I had lost that fire. I couldn't be there for my family due to my work life.
Fast forward to one year later. Lots of changes and I am working my way back to me. I've had missteps and tribulations. I have failed and I am succeeding. I have realized that I am happiest taking care of my family and photographing.
Just tonight I discovered that part of my foundation that I forgot about, my martial arts, is an absolute necessary part of me. A giant blinding flash of the obvious. I had forgotten, that mind, body and soul are connected. My mind and soul had been restored, but my body wasn't happy. So, we are signing up for the family class and all four of us are going to train together.
And everyday I continue to try to be worthy of my family's faith and love, of my friends continued support and of standing tall and being able to look myself in the eyes.